😊

volach-deactivated20230326:

“When the handle has snapped off the basket that held all your eggs…” gone girl tier monologue

assiraphales:

‘if sherlock is public domain than bbc sherlock—’ NO. I don’t want to hear it. if any of the bitches gonna kiss it’s gotta be them

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mihai-florescu:

mihai-florescu:

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How tf does a deactivated account still have blue checkmarks

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renthebarbarian:

Musk running Twitter be like

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memorycycle:

octopus 2022 wrapped

this year you disguised yourself as:

coral 10023 times

ocean floor 8064 times

coconut shell 244 times

various fish 196 times

scuba divers long lost wife 12 times

maculategiraffe:

my mom didn’t believe in lying to children so when I first asked about santa claus as a small child she was like “oh santa claus is another name for a man named saint nicholas who lived a long time ago. he was a very kind and generous man and he loved giving people presents and he would do things like put presents in people’s stockings when they were hung up to dry by the fire, so they would find them and be surprised. so now when we give presents at christmas it’s fun to pretend saint nicholas or ‘santa claus’ brings them. and we hang up stockings by the fire and when we get up in the morning there are presents in them, just like if saint nicholas was still alive to bring them!”

so that thanksgiving one of my uncles said jovially “so mac, are you being good for santa claus?” and little (not quite three year old) mac looked up and raised an eyebrow and said witheringly “he’s dead.”

helloneels17:

sidewalk-scrawls:

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Crying at this article calling Tumblr an “upstart” platform jdgdks

brand new used car

wanderthewood:

Brothers Water, Cumbria, England by Graham Hodgetts

randomitemdrop:

randomitemdrop:

depsidase:

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Item: plastic mold that allows the wielder to make a Ninja Turtle out of aerosolized cheese product

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biggaybunny:

Fever is a hilarious immune response. Our bodies tell the disease “hey, wanna see which one of us dies of overheating first? No? Too bad.” and honestly they’re not even the winners a decent chunk of the time but it works often enough that we never evolved it away or anything. Fantastic work.

fandom-oracle:

queer as in gay but also queer as in unusually and exceedingly peculiar and altogether quite impossible to describe

vermilionight-deactivated202302:

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~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

milfsisyphus:

the clock & calculator apps are like twin sisters to me

jethroq:

”walkable cities is ableist” has to be a psy-op. you can’t be this bad at understanding what the term means.